Because She Is Yours

I recently welcomed a group of women visiting the work of New Hope Girls.  One of them was introduced to me as a survivor. 

When she first arrived, I became fully aware that she knew each girl's pain firsthand. Childhood survivors seem to have a sixth sense, a “knowing.”  It’s more than street smarts, but more of protective, compassionate awareness. I noticed her heightened awareness of every possible dark spot or threat of danger while eating dinner on the beach.

Obviously triggered, I watched her control her breathing deliberately.  I observed how she always chose Safe, unwilling to enter into any fun or adventure that compromised her ability to self-protect.

I wanted to honor her process.  I longed to hold her tight, but I didn’t.

 That would have been too much, too soon. 

She is far down her healing road, years away from her abuse. Now, she walks with others into the liberating love where healing is found.  She is a mother to a beautiful girl with hazel eyes.  I can feel her fierce love for her children as she talks about them.  She is walking with them on their windy life journeys, ready to pounce and throw her life on the line to protect them from predators or danger.

I watched her suck in air as she entered our space, our safe home, our family.  She wiped away her tears sneakily and fought for composure.  She succeeded until she saw the girls with hazel eyes.

I imagined pain touching all the brokenness still inside her and igniting a fire in her belly like flint and steel.  She was determined to know what happened to them, and we sat together around the table, listening to the details of their files (I never do that!). Her fierce mom spirit was rising—she wanted to take them home.

A friend questioned, “Imagine if you could see them all with hazel eyes.”

Imagine the pain but also the fire

Imagine the heartbreak but also the fight

Imagine the fierce motivation to right every wrong

Because she is yours

AND

No One 

NOTHING

Will stop you from

Protecting,

Redeeming,

Restoring

And LOVING like

A mama bear,

A lioness,

A woman who knows.